Believe In Time

It's true I mean I have a great guy friend who I am in love with I don't exactly how it happened but it did and even though he tells me he doesn't like me in that way I can't accept it, I've never tried this hard in my life; I've always moved on before it could hurt. However we stayed really good friends despite my crush now I wonder to myself what have I done? I mean he knows it isn't my fault I like him however, I can tell that every time it comes up it kills him. I mean he just broke up with his girlfriend in California so I could understand why he doesn't wanna talk to me or even want to be near me however, what I don't understand is this... a few days ago we had a fight this is what happened (what he said is in blue what I said is in red) "i have something 2 ask u somethin important" "wut" "do u hate me u like always seem pissed @ me" "Im not pissed at all u just kinda come on me alot like u txt me everyd...

I wonder to myself in this life is it really us?We all have our ups and downs in life will it ever pause. I want to breathe a moment of peace in my life one second to pull back and say wow have I been that blind? People are surprised to see what they are in others eyes when you think you are alone you're far from it. I'm a very fragile even though people can't believe it I have too many sides that can confuse anyone I can be so many different people like I'm faucets of glass on a diamond. But at least when I look in the mirror I can see myself I may be sad but at least I can believe I have the support of people that love me. People sometimes as well need to breathe and take their own time to heal, people are here to be our guides but, sometimes it hurts to see the damage it can have on our life. But we don't have to hide because our 'truest friends' are right in front of us and will always try to protect us from the fall. But I know I've been blesse...

This week has been awful everyone keeps breaking me down everything in my life goes wrong. I can't do anything right I've been banged up right and left and I have lost the battle. Trying to pretend everything is okay in my life when my heart is cut open and smashed to pieces. I am not doing well in science at all I mean I'm trying so hard not break down but I do a repeating failure everything hasn't been going well for me. I mean I'm in love with one of my guy friends like it's bad because I just can't get over him and my best friend just hasn't been able to talk to me and now I grow cold because of all this stress I feel hopelessly trapped and if my life isn't traumatic enough my mother is suing my dad for failure to pay the child support and now I wonder why can't I be a normal teenager no I have to be special as well. Also what made this weekend just great is that my best friend gave me a total panic attack because she could become just like...

Well here stands 2010 in front of us but, what now? The choices now will influence us forever, now I'm thinking what my uncle said to me that I have the talent but I'm not making it to its full use, however the obstacles in life can change your life forever. Today I read this poem "I'm gonna smile like nothing's wrong. Talk like everything's perfect, Act like it's all a dream, And pretend it's not hurting me." Think of all those who have no hope all those caught in the problems this world gives but, some take the wrong path in the opposite direction sometimes we can't decide one get's lucky one falls into the opposite. We want so much to help them but, we have to learn we can't. People always want to make the lives of others easier but, we have to learn to let people fall even when we hate to see it happen. The two paths teach us that in that time we learn jealousy, anger, kindness, love. We learn jealous is of every...