Believe In Time

Wow it has seriously been forever since I have been on my blog. I've been so wrapped up in relationship issuses and school I've barely had enough time to breathe. Lately I have been the biggest player in the world because of the influences around me and I've fell to them, sadly. My life is in a constant spiral I finally see my overly perfect cousins beautiful and smart. Hard to not lose confidence, right? However the constant thoughts remain in my mind love is hard and dangerous becasue of the truth that lies between words the unspoken it all seems so close yet so far. Everything in a flux. Who am I to say life is hard when I have a roof, food, water, and dear faimly who love me why does the concept seem so forigen? To believe anyone cares is the most hardest concept to believe, because love is a different philosphy in itself, different idea, a different world. If you ever truly think about it you'll never know what it is exactly because once you feel the idea there is ...

I promise that I'm not so far away.This Christmas is so close however the gifts to me don't matter so much this is the day Jesus was born the day he came into this world as an innocent child and grew into an adult however did Jesus ever know how much He meant to us? Every year I walk into a mall and see people rush from store to store in the designer boots, bags that cost more than my house the skinny body I could only wish I could have while I appear as a girl in glasses carrying my book. I begin to see that even though they believe they have it all I am the lucky winner while I see those dropping more money than imaginable I had the best gift in the world one money could not buy the true meaning of Christmas. This is the time of the year when Jesus came to Earth and saved us all. However the feeling of guilt sits in my stomach because Jesus died on that cross for me and I whispered quietly to myself how could I have been so selfish? Jesus died just for my sake and for the res...

This ride that were on, it may be hard to understand it may be hard to think we're not alone however God has been standing there next to us this whole time, telling us everything is alright and not to worry because he will always be there for us. God has been in our own secret garden in pur hearts he sits under the white arch on the bench waiting for us and we try so hard to reach Him we try to extend our arms out so we will be caught in his embrace till the tears fall.

Man, everything has been crazy lately. Love is the most dangerous game I could play, because I somehow secretly know that feelings will get crushed and there is always too many expectations that are impossible. However , why does it make us all feel so beautiful inside? Why does it make us feel amazing and other emotions that suddenly rush to the surface because you feel so happy. The the thoughts slowly drift into your mind till they become part of your every thought, and when you stay in love it isn't so bad. However the drifting feeling of love makes everything hard and painful and you you begin to wonder why fell in love to begin with. The hours upon hours of crying and desperate texts and calls then turning to anger where you burn all their pictures and listen to Taylor Swift's "Picture to burn" more times than you can count backwards. Love they say, is only infatuation when you're younger however when you get older the more you realize how fake love had beco...

“ Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. ” As we go through life we worry what everyone else thinks when really we forget ourselves and how we are amazing no matter what anyone says, no matter how much life hits us we must stand up for ours...

I just need to know Do you like Shakespeare? Jeff Buckley? Watching movies on Sunday? Do you like kissing when it's raining? Making faces in the station? Do you like, I need to know What do you like? before you go Just tell me now what can you do to me that'll make this any better 'Cauz watching you makes me smile Makes me run a mile Just to see you And the places you go to Tell me Romeo What won't you do I want to go too You stopped and starred When I told you I was in love with you You told me you'd never go So magical Now were so in love and I'll never let you go It's just you and me Now here we go But I wanna know Do you like Shakespeare? Jeff Buckley? Watching movies on Sunday? Do you like kissing when it's raining? Making faces in the station? Do you like, I need to know What do you like? before you go

I know I know it's been forever since I've actually written I can actually say I'm lost in more ways than one right now, lately I feel like the center of attention I have so many boys after me and so many girls wanna hang out and I have straight A's to anyone else this would be awesome but for some reason lately I can be the most bipolar person I can be so happy at one point at others I can be so depressed. I'll tell you the truth I'm still stuck on Walter although I would never admit it to his face, today he wouldn't even look at me like if he did his eyes would burn out of their sockets or something, to be honest that totally freaked me out. Although I'm so hung up on the idea of proving myself to him I have no idea why I just want him to see how amazing I am and who I really am. Please, like that'd ever happen. I'm stuck in my own world I'm trapped I have so many people in my ear lately to anyone else having so many friends would be ...